Randomly generated resolutions for 2011

January 1, 2011 5:08 PM

Randomly generated resolutions for 2011
Click and click again to generate random new years resolutions for 2011, based on a corpus of tweets collected yesterday and today. Sometimes nonsensical, sometimes absurd, sometimes even plausible. "Be more dedicated to achieve. It avoids disappointment. which means you'll have to be." (potentially NSFW)

Methodology: I collected around 50k tweets with the word "resolution" in them, and did some basic text processing to extract text that looked like resolutions (in the form of "my resolution is to" and "my resolution:"). There's a Markov chain-based text generation algorithm (similar to Travesty or the defunct Markovfilter), which analyzes the tweets and outputs statistically similar text. Enjoy!

posted by aparrish (8 comments total)

On my third click I got one that contained "I will not chase that hard-to-reach rebel scum from all the way."

I'm totaly won over.
posted by oneswellfoop at 5:22 PM on January 1, 2011

"Try not to have one so I have an interesting."
"Be able to touch my toes without sex. WAIT! NO! I TAKE IT BACK!"
"Not to let anyone else in America Ferrera's large caboose."

Love it.
posted by Hardcore Poser at 7:32 PM on January 1, 2011

This one's a credo for awesome:

"Arrive - raise hell - leave"
posted by Hardcore Poser at 10:57 PM on January 1, 2011 [4 favorites]

Great! I'm glad people are enjoying it.
posted by aparrish at 10:44 AM on January 2, 2011

Stand up against ass.

Indeed.
posted by that's candlepin at 1:02 PM on January 3, 2011

"Show the government. Watch out, vaginas of NY!"

That was worth clicking for a while.
posted by rmless at 2:51 PM on January 3, 2011

"Go somewhere with my Netflix addiction."

to the couch?
posted by janepanic at 8:54 PM on January 4, 2011

"GET SOME KETCHUP."
posted by Nattie at 7:27 AM on January 19, 2011